Tales From Patwoman's Mailbag, Part 2

July 4th. American Independence Day. How fitting that I take this opportunity to express my First Ammendment Rights. No, I'm not petitioning the government for a redress of grievances. I meant, the whole free speech thing... as it pertains to talking about whatever I want to talk about today.

What? It doesn't mean that?

Whatever. Today, I present the second installment of Pat's Mailbag. As always, no wagering, please.

Dear Pat,
It seems like you've been knitting a lot lately. What's up? Did you lose your job or something?

Dear Reader,
No. They haven't caught on to me yet I'm still working. And I'm actually knitting about the same. I'm just finishing more. Actually, if truth be told, I'm frogging about the same, too. Boo!

Dear Pat,
We haven't heard you talk about a**holes who drive with the cell phone glued to their ears and the accidents they cause and almost cause lately. Have you been on the road lately? Are you sure you didn't lose your job?

Dear Reader,
No, I had machine guns installed under the Patmobile's front bumper.

Dear Pat,
What's up with the Chaos Sweater? You haven't talked about it in a while.

Dear Reader,
No, I haven't. Have I?

Dear Pat,
What's the last good movie you saw?

Dear Reader,
I've seen a couple of good ones lately. I just saw The Machinist, with Christian Bale, on cable. He looked so good in Batman Begins, but he'd lost 63 pounds to do this movie. Ew. Still, fine acting. Saw X3 in the theatre. You know I loves me some Hugh Jackman. (I've actually got a little Patrick Stewart thing, too. But Wolverine... Grrr, baby!) I watched a horrible movie on cable last night. What The Bleep Do We Know? It had some potential, combining physics and philosophy, but it didn't pan out. After a while I wondered if I were watching some Scientology training film. Also, there was a shocking absence of good-looking, shirtless men in this flick.

Dear Patwoman,
What about Isabeau? Are you ever going to finish Isabeau?

Dear Reader,
Yes, as a matter of fact. I have the lining now and I hope to finish it today, on my holiday. I also should have the Slip Stitch Ribbon Top done, too. So, it should be a good blog day tomorrow. Be sure to come back.

Dear Patwoman,
I notice lately you've been talking less about Batman and more about others, like Beastmaster. I worry that Adam West will be hurt when he sees how infrequently you talk about him these days. Have you lost your feelings for AW? Have your Batman fantasies grown cold? Because the Batster is still hot for you, Babe. He still remembers all those wild nights at the What A Way To Go-Go, doing the Batusi with you. Those are memories that, I promise you, AW holds to his heart tighter than the Batcuffs ever held Joker. You know what I'm saying, Patwoman? It's not fair for you to keep talking about Beastmaster or Kevin Sorbo or Hugh Jackman or Gerard Butler or grrrrr Christian Bale! (And, by the way, that movie painted way too dark a picture of Batman/Bruce Wayne. I mean, yeah, it's lonely having a secret identity and responsibilities and all. And yes, there is some measure of revenge involved. But Katie Holmes? That is just way too depressing to think about!) Where was I? Oh, yes. So anyway, Patwoman, I urge you to think about all you've had with AW. Think about all the Bat-good times and all the sweet Bat-sentiments we've shared. Think about what's in the Bat Utility Belt. Remember? Do you want to give all that up?

Dear Adam,
I thought we were on a break?