Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all of you. If you are not a mother yourself, then you have a mother or know a mother. Wish them a happy day.

I wanted to remember my mother, Dee, here for you. She has been gone a long time now, longer than I have been a mother myself. Yet, I still feel the loss just as sharply as I ever did. I was thinking about it today--how does one appreciate their mother when their mother is gone? Flowers on the grave? It's hours away.

What I've decided is that I would tell you about my mom and about the ways I am like her. That way, since you know me, you will know her a little, too.

1. Mom loved people who could make her laugh. She loved to laugh and she wanted to laugh, but it didn't come easy. You had to earn that laugh. I used to try and make her laugh by belting out a really bad rendition of "Hey Big Spender", with a dishcloth as a prop. She loved T, by the way. He cracked her up all the time. She would've loved R & M for that same reason.

2. Mom was a sleepwalker and did a lot of crazy things in her sleep, too. She broke her leg in her sleep, even. I have never injured myself more than a bruise, but I have done done some pretty dangerous things.

3. Mom was crafty. I've already told you she taught me to knit and crochet. She did hairpin lace and quilting and sewing, too. She could also draw very, very well. She didn't do it often, though. Maybe she felt drawing was just impractical? I don't know.

4. Mom loved to read. She read voraciously. It was probably the reason I learned to read so young. There were always books in the house, books of all kinds--Ellery Queen and Agatha Christie Mysteries, science fiction, Tales From The Cryptkeeper's Vault, Alfred Hitchcock magazine, romance novels, encyclopedias, historical biographies, Life, Look, newspapers, comic books, Readers Digest condensed novels...

Two things are important about this. One, we didn't have a lot of money when I was growing up. Yet, every Saturday, when we went to the grocery store, we got to pick out a comic book or magazine. And every 6 weeks or so, when the Weekly Reader flier was passed out at school, we got to get 2 books. Each. So that instilled in me, at a very young age, the importance of knowledge.

Two, Mom was not very restrictive about what kinds of things we could read. Her opinion was that all reading was good. I read a lot of crap, certainly. But I also read a lot of really good things--things that made me think. I think this is maybe the best thing Mom ever did for me--allow me the opportunity to experience other opinions and other thoughts and beliefs, other ways. I feel that such a freedom has made me so much more capable of deciding what I believe in and who I am than people who have only been allowed to learn one set of opinions.

Mom would've liked to read my blog, I think. She might have thought I used the f-word a little too often (That's one really big way we are different. Mom never said it. She always said "the f-word." Even in relaying what someone else said: "He said 'F-word you, f-er. You can f-word yourself for all I f-wording care.' It was hilarious to hear her.") I think she would have thought most of my posts were pretty silly. But I think she would've liked to read them.

Happy Mother's Day, Mom.