The One Where Patwoman Goes To WalMart

Now, those of you who know me, know that's a place I usually steer clear of. First of all, the parking lot is hell.

I mean, it's like a place where all the escaped lunatics go after they've broken out of the maximum security ward of The Hospital For The Criminally Insane. They linger there, waiting to do something crazy, unexpected, and potentially life-threatening, under the guise of parking a car. If you're not very, very careful, they will take you out.

That's assuming you don't first take out one of the suicidal children that weave in and out of the cars, three quarters of a mile ahead of their parents. Or that you can even find a parking spot that isn't occupied by empty baskarts and dirty diapers. (Again, the work of the criminally insane.)

Once inside, I have to tune out all the childbeaters. What is it about WalMart that makes people want to whoop their kids in public? I worked a Christmas season at Toys R Us one year and never saw so many ass whippings.

But, if you can do all that... WalMart is a wonderous place. I bought some yarn on sale, a toilet seat, 3 packs of gum, some pens, and this:

You see why I had to buy it, right?

Canal Walk, Garden Gnomes, Knitting, And Who Else? Adam West.

Today, we took a walk along the canal downtown so R could take some pics. He's always been interested in photography, but now he's thinking of actually changing his major to Photography. (From Anthropology)

Plus, since the heart attack, I have been nagging encouraging T to walk every day. I think we walked about 2-3 miles today, but that's by no means a scientific measurement.

It started to rain as we were walking, but since (contrary to popular belief) I won't melt in the rain, and since cameras are notoriously blind to the rain, we just kept going.

The canal walk starts at the Lilly Lab at 10th street and goes all the way down behind the zoo. It's a very pleasant walk, with lots of foliage and murals and art to look at. (It goes by the State Museum and the Eiteljorg Museum, as well.)

We amused ourselves a little by playing "Guess how deep the algae is?" as we walked. Then we saw these warnings carved into the cement every 25 feet or so. As if we had to be told.


Oh, and then some wooly mammoths ambushed R.



After the walk, T and I spent quite a bit of time searching for a couple of garden gnomes for the movie. It's been more difficult than you would imagine.

Here's a funny story... Someone told Blamey's boyfriend (who has also been looking) "Garden gnomes are a myth. They don't really exist."

Oooooo-kay.

One more thing... (and I've not told T about this, so Shhhh)

Last night I dreamed I was at a movie premiere (mine?) and Adam West was there. He was wearing a hand-knitted sweater made from some sort of blue (cotton?) variegated yarn. Or maybe the sweater had been knitted and then dip-dyed. I don't know. But I was trying to get him to sign my DVD and I was surreptitiously examining the sweater at the same time. (Shoddy construction, too. Should have been knit at a tighter gauge. Should have used a softer yarn. And the color was girly.)

Well, he wouldn't sign, and instead of being hurt, I raged at him. "Who made this sweater for you?"

So, does this mean I fear rejection? Or that I feel superior about my knitting?

By the way, is it wrong to make my cat eat a Red Hot Atomic Fireball?

My New Dice Purse Is Here! Oh, And Some Knitting Stuff, Too

Back in August, when I went to GenCon, one of the things I saw that I had to have was this purse. It's all leather, too. Suh-weet!

I actually saw this bag about 10 steps into the exhibit hall. But, being the Queen of Cheap, I thought, "No, I'm not going to buy the first thing I see. I'll take a lap around the exhibit hall and if I still want it when I get back to this point, I'll buy it."

Of course, they had sold out by the time I got back. But the guy was nice enough to take my name and email so I could order one from him. Don't think I haven't been kicking myself for not buying every day up until this one came.

The film project is going well, too. I can't tell you how pleased I am with this bunch of actors. What pros! I am already thinking of other projects I'd like to do with each of them.

In the meantime, I am doing a little Christmas knitting. Yes, I know. I said I wasn't going to do any this year. But... you know. I am doing mainly scarves and mittens, stuff like that. And, of course, my goal is to finish Chaos for T for Christmas this year. However, the way he has been losing weight lately, I'm a little unsure of the fit now.

Is it wrong to make my cat eat cat animal crackers?

La Plaza Fiesta... That's Gaelic, Right?

You would think I would not be confused by the two. I had really wanted to go to the Irish Festival, which was downtown today at Military Park. So T and I and M and R all loaded into the Patmobile and headed downtown. The confusion comes in because I went to Military Plaza, instead.

Now, there were tents and booths and bands and stuff all set up at Military Plaza, so I wasn't being totally stupid. Okay, I probably should have realized I was in the wrong place when I saw the Mariachi band. And the signs written in Spanish.

But, La Plaza Fiesta was a happenin' place. I know this, because we were only there for about 2 minutes when a drunk (I hope he was drunk. Otherwise, he has no excuse.) guy comes up to M and I as we are walking along and turns and--I really have no other way to describe this--shakes his ass at us. Then he points and winks and blows a kiss to M and runs off. I think M and I stared at each other for about 30 seconds, shocked, before laughing out loud.

There were lots and lots of interesting crafts for sale there. Woodcraft, leatherwork, neat stuff made from natural materials like shells and porcupine quills and stuff. R bought a wooden flute.

But I was pretty fascinated by the colorwork in these sweaters. Lots of Mexican and Native American motifs. Mostly children's sweaters, though, so I didn't buy today. I did also see some great crochet work--ponchos, beanies, stuffies.

And this shawl, which I thought was the most awesome-est shawl! It's triangles of leather, crocheted together to form a pattern, with a crochet edge and some fringe. Way cool. And too expensive for me. Besides, when have I ever worn a leather shawl? I just thought it was cool.

I did see a lot of silver jewelry I liked, particularly some Aztec calendar charms and some turquoise rings. I was able to exercise some restraint there, but in the end, I did end up purchasing a pretty sweet necklace with pale blue stones.

By this time, we had figured out that the Irish Festival was taking place about 8 blocks away at Military Park. So we decided to make it a Two Festival Day.


I was a little disappointed by this sign out front. What the hell?


Of course, I naturally gravitated to the knits. These are children's sweaters again. But look at the aran patterns! I must admit, I am one of those knitters who likes to do the really complex cabling and stuff. (Except Chaos. Don't get me started on T's Chaos sweater again.)

Found some sheep there. There was apparently going to be some sheep herding demonstrations later (because you never know when you'll need that skill) so they had a couple penned up here. They were pretty friendly and this guy with the horns came right over to the fence when I started talking to him. But you know, I'm pretty chicken when it comes to animals larger than a housecat, so I didn't pet him even though that seemed like that's what he wanted. Do people pet sheep? Do the sheep like it?

Pretty cool music here, too. There were several stages set up. We listened to these guys, Lathan and Lathan, for a while. I really wanted to hear Gaelic Storm, but they weren't playing until much later.

One of the coolest things about the Irish Festival was this parade. Bagpipes are frackin' awesome!



I did not escape this festival without buying jewelry, either. I purchased a lovely Claddagh pendant to celebrate my Irish heritage.

New Knitting Content!!!! (And a FO, to boot!)

Yes, I know you are all shocked by that. I'll bet you were thinking I didn't even know how to finish something.

Well, I do. So there.

Here's my Calla, from Magknits. I had actually planned to make these straps wider, or perhaps turn the thing into a boatneck shell, since I am not crazy about the whole showing-of-the-bra-straps-look. But, I guess I just spaced it or something. So, as I was casting off the second piece, I was like "Oh yeah..."

Anyway, I decided to just go the tank-top way, rather than rip out and reknit. Honestly, I had worries about whether it would look okay over my boobage. So I thought this might end up as a gift for someone.

But then, I finished it, and tried it on. And said, "Give it away? Oh, screw that! I'll just wear it under a jacket!" I wore it to work today (That's why I look so tired and used up in the pictures. This is taken at the end of the day.) and got a few compliments.

And T is happy that I have moved one project off the UFO mound in the living room. (Even though he surely realizes I have been steadily increasing my stash the whole while!)

Speaking of that...

Got this whole box at a garage sale last weekend. I don't know if you can tell, but this is a copy paper case filled with yarn. Yeah, most of it is acrylic. But the whole box was $3, and I have plans for acrylic yarn.

Gabgab has plans too, I think.

In other news, I have been working steadily on my film and hope to be able to show you some stills soon.