If you're not knitting, the terrorists win

(My mostly on-topic ramblings about knitting. And life in general. My life in specific.)

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Location: Indiana, United States

I'm a middle aged mother of 2 grown children and wife to a man who doesn't seem to mind my almost heroin-like yarn addiction. I spend my time writing, knitting, and generally stressing out.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Shades Of Philip K. Dick

I thought this was cool and scary.

Step 1: SenseCam records everything that happens to you and then you download it into a computer hard drive for storage so that you have an accurate, first person “memory” of your life.

Step 2: Create technology to re-implant these memories, in case something happens and you ever need them. (Amnesia, Alzheimer’s, CRS)


Step 3: Create technology to implant these memories in other people’s brains (Total Recall) for fun, cheap vacation memories or something like that. Or for more nefarious stuff (Imposter, Paycheck).

Step 4: Create robot technology sophisticated enough to accept these memories as their own. (Blade Runner, Screamers.)

You’ve been warned, people.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Purple Fuzzy Stripes


I liked the Symbolism Scarf so much that I decided to do the same with some colors. (So I guess that blows the symbolism, right?)

These are some of the yarns I have left over from some other projects, all in a purplish tone. There’s some Divine, some Yarn Bee Cameo, Yarn Bee Soft Delight, some Wool Ease in some sort of grey color, some sort of railroad yarn that I don’t even remember what it was, and some Red Heart in a light purple color. (Sorry. That’s how I remember it, at least. The labels for these balls are long gone.)


This was about 200 stitches on size 10.5s. Garter stitch, same as the Symbolism Scarf. (Oh wait? Is that symbolic of something?)

It’s soft and fluffy and a little bit weird looking. But I like it.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Every Hat Needs A Matching Scarf

Well, not every hat. Certainly those hats that have the long flaps that wrap around your neck like a scarf don’t need a scarf. And a chef’s hat wouldn’t need a scarf. Neither would a fireman’s hat.

But, I digress.

This particular hat needed a scarf. A loooong scarf.
This is your basic 2X2 rib, same yarns as the Turn A Square Hat. I picked up the three stripes in each color, just on the ends and left the middle of the scarf plain. It's about 6 feet long.

So, hat and scarf… another Christmas present down.

Way to go, Patwoman!

Monday, September 21, 2009

Turned That Square

Here is another Christmas gift, modelled by R. It’s the Turn A Square Hat.

I had so many problems with this hat, I almost don’t even want to talk about it. First, my gauge was off. You know I am a loose knitter, so I usually automatically start with needles 2 sizes smaller. And I did swatch a bit. I swatched on straight needles. Then I started knitting with circulars.

Yeah. You know what happened. I knit about an inch and a half and then realized that no human head is that size. Frog.

So, up a size on circulars. Because I was tired and did the math wrong. Way too big. Frog.

So, down a size. (For a total of 3 needle sizes.) Now I’m good.

If you’ve seen this pattern, you know that it calls for a MC yarn in a solid and a CC in a variegated. But my MC was a flecky-grey, and I really liked the dark and light stripes in the pattern picture. So I used a white yarn and a black yarn for my stripes.

Which gives you a lot of ends to weave in. Remember that for future projects.

The pattern itself is an easy one. I used stitch markers, but I probably didn’t even have to, since the pattern makes the decreases pretty obvious.
This is Moda Dea Wool n Silk in Pewter. I used less than one skein. The stripes are Lion Wool in Black and Cream.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

This Is Not About Kanye


I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty damn sick of hearing about Kanye West. Yes, it was bad manners, but sheesh, people. Shut up about Kanye, already. Why do you think he did it in the first place? He doesn’t give a flying fat rat’s ass about Beyonce’s video, he just wants people to talk about Kanye.

So no more. And no more about Jon and Kate, either. And while we’re at it, let’s all shut the hell up about Megan Fox. I don’t know any of these people. (And you know it’s only fun to trash people you actually know.)

What I really want to talk about is the surprising number of zombies I am seeing lately.

Okay, maybe they’re not actual zombies. But maybe they are? It’s so hard to tell. I’m driving to work in the morning and I see one every now and then, shuffling along deadly at the side of the road near the bus stop. They don’t even look at the traffic passing them.

Or I’m driving someplace at night and see them shambling along the side of the road, staring off into the dark. And yeah, they could be out late at night for some legitimate reason (after all, I am coming back from a quarterly staff meeting myself, or the grocery store, or the gas station…) or they could just be drunk and walking—and in that case, thanks for not driving, zombies!

Of course, if you must have zombies, then shamblers are the ones you want. They’re easy to outrun, easy to confuse, afraid of fire, and can’t open doors or break window glass. So, as long as you stay in the car, you’re usually pretty safe.


I’m really only concerned because all the evidence is pointing to a mass zombie outbreak. Well, not actual evidence, but certainly stories that I’ve skimmed the headlines and then jumped to conclusions about. Like this one. If I know my Max Brooks, I'm pretty sure this is how the whole thing starts!

And there you sit, idly gossiping about Kanye.

Gettin' My Irish On

I love the Irish Fest. And it's not for the whiskey, either. I just love the music, the culture, the dancing...

Yeah, I'm Irish. As much as I'm anything else, I guess. My mom always told us we had Irish heritage, but I recently got to see part of a family tree one of my aunts did and it seems to me that in my family we just moved to another country and married someone there. Then their children would go to another country and marry someone there. So Irish, English, French, Cherokee... you name it.




I still love Irish Fest.




Lot of hand knits there, as you can imagine. Like these Aran knitted sweaters.




Yay! Irish Fest!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Somebody Had A Birthday!


It was M's boy, E. M baked him a cake.

M also made him an apron for his business, Cakes Anonymous.


We had fun.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

In An Evening Toque


And it lived up to its name. I knit this in an evening. Not sure exactly what a toque is, other than a hat, so I’m guessing it lived up to that part of its name, too.



I wanted something to go with the Super Loops Scarf. You know I’m all about making sets now… This is Sensations Bellezza Canditi yarn in Canditi Blue, same as the scarf. It’s very soft and light at the same time, even though it looks very fluffy.

This is another Christmas gift. I am on a roll!

Loopy!

Here’s a clever little scarf. It’s the Super Loops Scarf. And what fun to knit.
Basically, you knit this entire thing in garter stitch, then instead of binding off the last stitches… wait for it

You drop them! Ha!

And then you ladder them down… all the way down to the bottom… like a bad girl! Everything inside you is screaming No! I’ve dropped stitches and they are creating a massive runner all the way down! Everything, that is, except this one tiny piece of you that’s snickering wickedly as you use your fingers to help that runner along.

Mwah-ha-ha-ha!

Anyway, what you are left with is this: a loopy edge. It makes a nice, conservative fringe and no one would suspect that you broke any knitting rules (like the rule against dropping stitches)!

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Internet Cat Free Day

A day without cats? That’s crazy! I can’t support that.

But, you know that I believe urlesque and this stupid blogger have the right to voice their opinions. They have the right to make up some stupid Day Without Cats. (Even though they could avoid being offended by any cats by not visiting sites like LOL Cats or opening emails with the subject line of FW:FW:FW:FW:FW:FW: FW: Too Funny! )

But, I also am free to enjoy cats on the internet. So, in honor of A Day Without Cats, I will visit LOL Cats several times during the day. I will forward every email with pictures of cats doing funny stuff. And I will post several gratuitous pictures of my own cats.

Ha!

Monday, September 07, 2009

I'm A White Knight

Your distinct personality, The White Knight, might be found in most of the thriving kingdoms of the time. Don Quixote was a White Knight as was Joan of Arc, the Lone Ranger and Crusader Rabbit. As a White Knight you expect nothing in return for your good deeds. You are one of the true "Givers" of the world. You are the anonymous philanthropist who shares your wealth, your time and your life with others. To give, is its own reward and as a White Knight you seek no other. On the positive side you are merciful, sympathetic, helpful, giving and heroic. On the negative side you may be impulsively decisive, sentimental and misdirected. Interestingly, your preference is just as applicable in today's corporate kingdoms.

Here's the test.

Sunday, September 06, 2009

I Dreamed Of Dinosaurs

So this guy, Hans Larsson, at the McGill University in Montreal is saying he can make dinosaurs out of chickens. After all, the prevailing theory is that dinos evolved into birds, right? So that shouldn’t be too hard to do… outside of the actual science of the thing, I mean.

But he says he can do it. Turn on one gene, turn off another, introduce a certain hormone at a certain time, etc. Sounds pretty simple to me. (You know, once you have the science worked out.) I think he can do it, too. (Or already has, but not well enough to announce it to the world.)


Come on. You know scientists were working on this stuff before Michael Crichton ever even thought of Jurassic Park. You know scientists are working on it now. Should they be working on it? I don’t know. You know I’m okay with science for science’s sake most of the time. And I doubt there will ever be a Jurassic Park. So it’s not that that gives me pause.

What bothers me is… what are we going to do with these dinos we create? We can study their physiology. Or raise them and study their behavior. Or study the evolution (de-evolution?) of animals. But would we really be doing that?


Wouldn’t we, in fact, be studying an animal that may be physiologically similar to a dinosaur? Dino innards are pretty scarce, folks. Who knows if what we make would be a dino or a chicken that is similar to a dino? Same with behavior. If it’s not a dino, is it behaving like a dino? Or a genetically altered chicken? Especially if we do not recreate its environment and just expect to observe the way it acts in a controlled environment of our creation.

Think of the tigers in the zoo. Their habitat has a stream, foliage, etc., like in the wild. But is that how a tiger acts in the wild?

And doesn’t the whole observation depend on whether or not an animal’s behavior is innate or learned? Wouldn’t a dinosaur nee’ chicken act more like whatever it is raised to act like? Or would we just keep them in a separate environment and see how they acted with no animal to teach it what kind of animal it should be?

And evolution depends on so many factors. Just think of how humans would have evolved if our shoes were shaped like gloves! (Just kidding.)

Anyway, so the question is: Should we make chickenosaurs? It’s still interesting and has the potential to teach us (if nothing else, then to teach us what possibilities arise by altering an animal’s—or a person’s—genes). But let’s call it what it is… an experiment in gene manipulation for the sake of gene manipulation. We’re trying to prove we can make an animal from another different, but similar animal. Let’s not try to convince people we’re trying to prove something about dinosaurs.

Oh, and I really did dream of dinosaurs the other night. I dreamed about a scientist who was trying to genetically create dinosaurs. She ended up creating a human/dino hybrid. And it proved to be self-aware.

My final thought was, “Damn it. So now I can’t kill it.”

Thursday, September 03, 2009

Symbolism Scarf

This is my new scarf. It’s a simple garter stitch scarf, knitted lengthwise, with the beginnings and ends knotted for fringe. I used four different partial balls, all in shades of grey.

Hence, the name.

All these yarns are different textures, too. Different weights. But they come together well and make a really nice scarf.

More symbolism, in case you need to be hit on the head with it.

R tells me Symbolism Scarf is actually a misnomer. He believes it should be called Moral Abiguity Scarf instead.

Tuesday, September 01, 2009

One More Job Hunting Tip

I know you’ve heard this before. Everyone has heard it before. But, if this past few days of interviews is any indication, most people think it doesn’t concern them.

Here’s the tip: Don’t bathe yourself in cologne.

Seriously, you’d think people would realize… one small spritz of cologne = okay. 45 spritzes = not okay. Or, let’s put it a different way. If I can smell your cologne before you enter the room, that’s bad. If I can smell your cologne ten minutes after you leave, that’s bad. If I can smell your cologne all day because the scent is burned into my nostrils, that’s bad.

I understand when older people do it, since you lose a lot of your sense of smell as you age (still, you’d think you’d recognize the fact you’re using too much when you’re spraying half a dozen times). And I understand when really young people do it, because they are relatively new to the workforce and maybe don’t know all the do’s and don’t’s of interviewing yet.

But all of these people have been people my age, or thereabouts. And while none of the perfume has been obnoxious, like those shiteous kind that smell like baby powder, it has been overwhelming.

Listen, don’t wear any cologne to an interview, okay? Some people are very sensitive to it. (I’m not particularly sensitive, so that should tell you how bad it was this week.) But, if you think you smell bad enough that you need more than one small spritz of cologne… take a shower.


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