Happy Leap Day!

Wow! I can't believe it's leap year again! I feel like I should post something special, since it only happens once every four years.

I've been doing this blog for 2 years now. That means this is the first Leap Day since I've been blogging. I wish I were writing something cool so that I could go back in time to see what I posted today!

Oh well. I probably won't remember to do it anyway.

I Can't Be Trusted To Go To Michael's Anymore

I was just going to get some dpns to finish a hat. That's all. I promise. I even had a 50% off coupon so I didn't have to feel guilty about buying some new needles. I didn't even veer off to touch yarn. I just went straight to the needle aisle. And I was doing so well... I really was.


But then, right before I reached the needle aisle, I see this endcap display... Bernat Soy Yarn for $2 a skein! Well, now. I can hardly be blamed for picking up a few skeins of that. I mean, how could I not?

On the same display they had Bernat Alpaca, a really, super-soft yarn, in this manly color. Not on sale, but it was right there. And I've been meaning to make T a scarf...

Now, at this point, I am feeling slightly guilty. I mean, I really did just come in for dpns. But not too guilty, right? I mean, it's just a couple of skeins. Not like I'm taking food out my kids' mouths, right? So I just continue on around the corner to where the needles are.

But then, I see Bernat Max is on sale for $3! I almost pass that up. And then I remember when M saw this yarn and was really excited and wanted a scarf in the green color. This was, of course, after I'd made her about 10 scarves, so I said I had made her enough scarves, but if it was ever on sale I might get some. And, well, her birthday is Thursday of this week...

Oh God, what was happening to me? I had to get out of there! I grab my needles, throw them into my now-full basket (and really, who gets a shopping basket when they are just there to get some dpns? I think there was something subliminal going on), and make a break for the door.


Suddenly, some variegated worsted leaps off the shelf and into my basket! And then some baby yarn in pink! Then in lilac! My God! Will it never end?

Finally, I make it to the checkout, where T sardonically asks, "Do we need to buy another storage container too?"

But I can't be too hard on him, really. After all, I went into Michael's to get this:

and ended up with this:

I Know You're Wondering...

..what is Patwoman up to now?

I feel slighly subversive lately. I've had a streak of weird people that I've had to deal with this week
(Like the man who told me he wasn't computer literate because "I wouldn't have a robot in my house!" or the lady who completely fabricated her resume and then told me "The unemployment office told me to do that so I would get a job." or the woman who felt I should hire her because she "lived down the street from there all my life!").

You know what I always say: It's always something. So it might as well be this.

But it has made me feel like doing something... slightly bad.

And so I started this:

It makes me happy.

You can find the pattern here. She has a lot of great free patterns on her site. I've made the Christmas Emergency Hat several times. And I printed off the pattern for the Comfy Raglan Sweater, which will be the perfect thing to use that ball of Sensations Boucle for.

Here is my progress on the hat. I'm doing the longer neck version, so--obviously--it has a longer neck than the one in the picture. And my ends are still loose on the inside, so it does have an unfinished look. Oh, and it's not finished yet. That also adds to the whole unfinished theme.

Looking to finish this over the weekend. Then, who knows? I might have to try it out!

I Had It Again...

You know.

The dream where Hugh Jackman, Gerard Butler, Eric Bana, and I are all playing Twister. And then we take a break to eat some corn dogs. And then, I'm suddenly too tired to stay awake.

It seems significant to me. What do you think it means?

I Want To Talk About The Matrix....

Not really. Or, rather, not specifically. I just thought I'd throw that out there for the nerd-attraction value. (You know who you are. Just go with it.)

Here's what I really want to say:

176 more days until GenCon!

Ah, GenCon. My nerdvanna. I want to marry you, GenCon, and have your nerdy little babies.


Seriously, though. I am excited. This year, I will be running an event, actually. It's called "The Road To Perdition," if you are interested. I guess you'd say it's the wild west meets Cthulhu.

I'd like to see if they have a knitting class again, too. Not because I need a class--I gots me some mad skillz, f'real--but because it's fun to take that little 2 hour knitting break. And because it's interesting to see what others are knitting.

Last year, the class conflicted with the belly dance class I'd signed up for. But the year before that, I learned to do the Knifty-Knitter. And it was fun.


And there were a lot of knitters there last year. Or, at least, fans of knitting. I saw a River Tam sweater that looked handmade. I saw a few Jayne hats--I had mine, as well. I saw some knitted camo dice bags. I saw a Pirate Beanie. And, I had my Everybody's Doing It Shrug on because it is freakin' cold in the Convention Center.

Oh, and T and R wore the Knitted Chainmail I made. That made quite a sight walking through Cirle Center Mall to get lunch.

My Baby Needs A Furry Blankie

Okay. She's not a baby. She'll be 18 in about a week and a half, actually. She'd probably be über pissed if she found out I called her my baby, too.

Luckily for me, she doesn't find my knitting interesting enough to read about it online.

So, here's what I did. I had all these novelty-type yarns and I was a little burned out on doing scarves. And, I have all these UFOs sitting around, so I wanted to actually finish something. And, I have these gigantor Speed Stix that are practically impossible to get your hand around because they're size 50! I don't know why I love 'em so much!

You would think the stitches would be so large that the afghan would be somewhat holey. But, you're using 4 strands of yarn, and the furry ones kinda close up those holes.
And, you'd think, with 4 strands of yarn, this thing would be so heavy you wouldn't want to cover up with it.

But, you'd be wrong. It's actually pretty fluffy and cuddly. And it only took me an evening to knit it.'

Here's my "pattern." (Because you can't really call a stockingette stitch afghan a pattern, can you?)

I used:

2 skeins Yarn Bee Luscious in Wild Plum
2 skeins Yarn Bee Playful in Waltz Blue Solid
4 skeins Moda Dea Zing in Midnight
5 skeins Lion Brand Fancy Fur in Bold Black
3 skeins Lion Brand Fancy Fur in Stained Glass Black

I Cast On 39 stitches, using Size 50 needles and a backwards loop cast on. (You can't really see stitch definition with so much fur going on.)

Then I knitted 6 rows in Garter Stitch.
Then I kept a 3 stitch Garter Stitch border around the Stockingette Stitch body until I was almost out of yarn.
Then 6 more rows in Garter Stitch and Cast Off.

I used 2 different colors of Fancy Fur in a striped pattern (as I ran out of one, I attached the other). But, I don't know that you can really see that.

This turns out to be about the size of the top of a twin bed. And, as I've said, very cuddly and soft. And, so quick you could do one in a few hours.



Yay for chubbies! Needles, that is. What were you thinking?

Triangle-tacular!

Okay. So I totally suck at titles. Whatever. I actually read recently that Philip K. Dick, who had those great titles like Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, never actually titled his novels and stories. He felt if he could come up with catchy titles, he would've been a headline writer, not a novelist. His work, instead, was titled by the editors. So there.

Now, where was I?

Oh yes. I wanted to show you this shawl.

It's the Easy Triangle Shawl from Lion Brand. Yes. You know I love the word easy in a title. Makes me feel like I might actually finish it.

I've made a couple of these, now. It's my favorite to make for a prayer shawl. The pattern is easy to memorize, easy to do without thinking too much about it. I only had one skein of Homespun in this color (Romanesque, which I believe is discontinued now), so I just knitted as much as I could. I think I did all but the last pattern repeat and the crocheted edging. It still looks good.


I like it, at least.

I don't know where I'm going to wear a shawl, though.

Blamey's Purse

I love Blamey. She is so supportive. The other day, she's in my office with a knit purse. It's your basic felted pocket purse, with i-cord handles. She says, "You could totally make one of these, couldn't you?"

What fun it is to make something that you know will be appreciated!

And, it just so happens it's Blamey's birthday that week. Blamey loves purses. Loves my knitting. Loves Sex In The City. So, here is what I made for Blamey's birthday: A cabled purse, made from Lion Brand Homespun (one of my fave yarns) in Deco. I made this pattern up, based on countless other purses that other people have made up, based on the Sex In The City purse.

Handles are bamboo. And I lined it in this pretty pink flowered fabric that feels a little like silk. Whoo-hoo!

We All Know What Day This Is

This is the day the Patriots are embarrassingly defeated on national television!

Well, we can hope. (Eli! Avenge your brother!)

I read yet another story today about yet another accusation of cheating by the Cheaters Patriots. Sure, it's just an accusation and there's no proof (because we all know what Belichick does with that proof). But you know what Patwoman always says: If two people see it, it's not a mirage.

As I was cruising the internet, looking for some sports writer who would give me some hope that the Giants would crush the Patriots (sadly, I've not found any with that opinion, and it may just be blind hope on my part) I found this test: What Kind Of Patriots Hater Are You?

It's fairly accurate, though it really only deals with my Belichick-loathing and not the whole package. Here are my results:

Because he rails against the sanctities of something we hold far more sacred than our own lives: the NFL. Not only does he cheat, he'd cheat if you were right there watching him do it. While he was at it, he'd run up the score, send out Rodney Harrison to shank your favorite team's quarterback, and then key their bus...

So, yeah, your hatred of the Patriots is completely justified. Be proud. But the point's moot. You can hate as much as you want, your opinion certainly doesn't matter to him. Nor to the NFL, which is going to keep making insane money off his success. But you can still hope that somehow, some way, someone will dent the guy's ego...

Judgment: You are an Utterly Inconsequential Patriots Hater.

And if you're a rational person, you're OK with that. Hatred, like a small wager, can make the game more interesting.

Go Giants!

Flame Beanie Is Defeated!

Third time knitting a hat is the charm, I guess.

Here is the finished hat. You'll notice a couple of things that are different about it from the original pattern. For instance, I changed the colors to more traditional flame colors. And I added some 2 X 2 rib instead of the garter stitch border at the bottom. Garter stitch just wasn't working for me.

And I basically just said "to hell with trying to get guage." I couldn't get it with the Caron Simply Soft that I was using, no matter what needles I tried. And it just kept being too big. So, just like I am no longer fighting the natural curl in my hair, I am no longer fighting the yarn/needles/guage for this hat.

I went up to #5s (which would be #7s for most of you)to get a 4st = 1" guage and then cast on 87 stitches instead of 116. That worked okay, until I got to top shaping. Then, the decreases were just going too slowly. So I added some extra decreases to get the length I wanted.

All in all, it's a nice hat. Especially since I basically did everything wrong from the start. But, the stranding certainly makes it warm, and it is really handsome.

Speaking of handsome, here is one more shot of T.